Fortune cookie “advise”

The other night I got the following, grammatically questionable fortune with my chicken and broccoli: Whoever took our carryout order dumped a bunch of extra fortune cookies into the bag. The next day, Dan put two into the flat of his palm and brought them to me.

“Let’s try it again, maybe today’s fortune will be better,” he said.

I picked one, cracked it open and found this:
Um…. Huh? We both looked at it for a while, trying to determine what letter could have been accidentally dropped or exchanged in “with” to no avail. I can think of word (or expletive) or two that could be placed between “to” and “with,” but otherwise, this exact intention of this fortune eluded us.

Dan was distracted by the boy, and took a few minutes before cracking his open. I went upstairs to my desk nook and did whatever it is I do.

“Trace?” He yelled up the stairs. “Mine doesn’t make any sense either. I really don’t know what they meant by this. Do you have an idea?”

Then he read the following aloud:

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3 thoughts on “Fortune cookie “advise””

  1. That last one makes absolutely ZERO sense! haha! Mine led to a layoff.

    Want a really good laugh? Read the chopstick instructions on the chopstick sleeves you get at Chinese restaurants.

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