All posts by TZT

Mom. She-hack. Armchair astronomer. Buddhist.

The boy who is the man

For the past several days, Dec has been playing with a bathtub basketball hoop my mother gave him, replete with a ball from every major sport in the U.S. It is currently stuck to the side of the television armoire in our living room. (Thankfully, the net is sealed at the bottom, so we aren’t swimming in balls.)

He watched some of a slam dunk competition with his dad over the weekend, a prelude to the NBA All-Star game. It included one player who put a cupcake with a lit candle between the backboard and the hoop, then extinguished the flame with the force of his dunk. Since then, Dec’s been “taking it to the cupcake” (a.k.a. sinking balls into the armoire net), yelling “YES!” in his biggest he-man voice.

If you were to ask Declan how he is doing in the past few weeks, he would have answered instead with his full name, followed by the daddy-induced tag line, “the boy who is the man.” He’s declared this to strangers in elevators, check-out clerks and anyone he’s talked to on the phone.

Since Sunday, he’s been referring to himself as his full name, followed by “the boy who is the man, LeBron Declan.”

The space between

One of the hardest things about working at home is the constant tug of war between the things I should be doing to secure us financially and the things I should be doing for my child.

On some days I am mindful and methodical about the way I spend each moment, I kick down deadlines, I help Declan make a new discovery, I do laundry, I write satisfying paragraphs, I am kissed by everyone in the house.

But on days like today, I end up feeling inadequate at everything. I can’t come up with enough ideas, send enough emails, make enough calls without feeling like I’m doing it all at Declan’s expense. And I can’t read books, marvel adequately at Dec’s independence or play imaginary games without feeling like I should be back at my computer, pressing forward, finding my next gig.

The dawn of compassion

“Hold Mars,” Declan told me, pressing a plastic ball into my hands.

“Now tell it you won’t hit it, push it or hurt it,” he said.

“I promise I won’t hit you, push you or hurt you,” I told the red planet replica. “You are my friend, and I will be kind and gentle with you.”

I stood up and handed it back to Declan.

“Do you understand me?” He asked. I nodded.

I may have to rename the dog Mars.

Last night, “Monster House” came on one of the family movie channels. Absentmindedly thinking it was fine for him to watch because it was animated, I left it on.

In the first moments, a scary old man grabs a tricycle away from a little girl, then breaks it and confiscates it. Declan’s face fell and his eyes welled with tears.

“He… he broke it!” He said, turned to me, his bottom lip was quivering.

“I know. That was mean, wasn’t it?” I replied.

“But what if she needs it?” He shook his head, clearly still stung by the cruelty of the scene.

The plot shifted to another character. I convinced Declan that the new boy on the screen was going to help the girl get her bike back, then I distracted him into hugs and storybooks and turned the TV off.

Perils and benefits of letting your two year old listen to Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band daily

1) Upon listening to “She’s Leaving Home” with his dad, he comes looking for mom, a crushed expression on his face. “It’s so sad!” He says, shaking his head. “The baby is gone. She’s just gone!”

2) When you’re sitting together and “For the Benefit of Mr. Kite” comes on, he looks at you and says “Oh, this is a really good psychedelic one.”

3) It’s indescribably awesome to hear him sing “With a Little Help From My Friends” and “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” at the top of his lungs while doing a full-body toddler dance.

4) Every song he hears that he likes on the radio, television, elevator, grocery store speakers, he asks “Is this the Beatles?”

Political stumping

As of now, I am not stumping for anything or anyone, but I am definitely feeling stumped.

For example… how is it that I learned more about Hillary Clinton’s policies during her informal interview with David Letterman (who, as much as I love him, is a mediocre interviewer at best) last week than I did in the entire segment on 60 Minutes with Katie Couric on Sunday night? Why was Barack Obama asked all about his campaign, his future, his family, while Clinton was mostly asked, in not very subtle terms, to please cry about Barack Obama and her apparent perfectionist of a father?

And why, as primary elections plow on, does every newscast I watch seem to paint Clinton as some kind of strange svengali cuckquean? It’s to the point that I, who really wasn’t a big fan of hers, have begun to 1) feel sorry for her and 2) feel that the media is even more ghoulishly, lip-smackingly sexist than I thought.

I remain undecided on the Clinton vs. Obama question, though. Assuming the Ohio primary does still matter, I’m at a loss about who to vote for. And that is rare.

As far as Hillary is concerned, I am not a fan of her war and anti-terrorism decisions, or the middling, poll-driven behavior that her husband was also so prone to. That said, I feel the Constitution has been gutted and skewered for the past eight years, with real “activist” anti-science appointments throughout the court system and trounced civil liberties. Hillary could hit the ground running and begin restore many things more quickly. And I prefer her health care and family policies. Being a member of a self-employed household, health care cuts closest to the bone for me.

On the other hand, I can’t deny that Obama seems to embody a spirit of Democratic renewal for all kinds of American people. The fact that he is pulling so many who may have felt disenfranchised out to the polls is already a vital contribution to the country’s political future. He is damn inspiring, complex, interesting and someone who, because of his lack of baggage, I wouldn’t have to hold my nose to vote for. I don’t know that he could have the immediate impact that Hillary could, but when you think about some of those vaunted, fallen political leaders of the 1960s – the ability to orate well and inspire can ripple through generations.

I am open to persuasion.

P.S. Since Edwards left the race, they have been struggling with this question over at MOMocrats too.

Evidence that his daddy worked in the entertainment industry far too long…

As Declan adjusted letter magnets on the refrigerator this evening, he shook his head and muttered to himself, for no discernible reason:

“Jesus, what a business!”

(If you know my husband at all, you know how appropriate – and hilarious – this is.)

P.S. Dan responds to the newspaper and TV news out loud quite often.

The joys of local TV journalism

I used to think that the Midwest generated an inordinate amount of hysterically bad local television journalism. I was never sure whether the lack of substance (or a lack of a sense of irony) indicated that too many TV reporters grew up in sanitized pods, made the assumption that their audience did or just spent far too much time sniffing hair gel.

Then I watched a broadcast on a local Washington DC station, where the anchor stumbled through horrifying murder statistics and a puff story about zoo babies with a clock behind him that remained bizarrely crooked for the entire broadcast. And I watched some New York City-area broadcasts with their own amateur qualities. I realized we heartlanders are not alone.

Of course, John Stewart’s Daily Show has made the parody of the self-absorbed TV “journalist” obliviously reporting on a story that seemed clearly insane to the rest of us into an art form. But I’m glad to see that the real thing is still out there, alive and well (in this case, from Michigan). Although, watching this, I have to suspect that the producers have a sense of humor:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUJ4es4cYIU]

Across the Universe Day

Today at 7 p.m. EST, NASA is beaming the Beatles song “Across the Universe” toward Polaris, the North Star. Apparently, the moment is the exact time the song was recorded 40 years ago, and meant to be a “cheerier” greeting to aliens than the usual Morse code we routinely transmit into space. This event is also apparently part of NASA’s 50th anniversary celebration.

According to the Bad Astronomer, Polaris is far from the best star choice if the objective is to greet distant life forms, but it is one of the few stars that large numbers of humans know by name (outside of the sun).

Organizers are encouraging people to listen to the song at the same moment all around the world. There is more information about it here. The event will also be broadcast on NASA TV online.

For today, we’ve put the song at the top of our Cosmic playlist:


P.S. Declan doesn’t believe me that this is a Martian crater because it isn’t red.